Just a feeling

Perhaps this song can express what exactly I feel. It's all just about a feeling that I have.

I watched you cry, bathe in sunlight by the bathroom door

You said you wish you did not love me anymore

You left your flowers in the backseat of my car

The things we said may have left permanent scars

Obsessed, depressed at the same time

I can't even walk in a straight line

I'm a light in the dark, no sunshine

No sunshine, no sunshine

She cries, "This is more than goodbye

When I look into your eyes

You're not even there"

It's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

Just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

'Cause it's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling

(I can't believe that it's over)

You've hit your low

You've lost control, you want him back

You may not believe me but I gave you all I had

Undressed, confessed that you're still mine

I rolled around in a bed full of tears and I'm still laying in the dark, no sunshine

No sunshine, no sunshine

She cries, "This is more than goodbye

When I look into your eyes

You're not even there"

It's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

Just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

'Cause it's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling

(No, I can't believe that it's over now)

It's just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

So much to say it's not the way she does her hair

It's the way she seems to stare right through my eyes

And in that darkest day that she refused to run away

From love she tried so hard to save

It's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

Just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

It's just a feeling

It's just a feeling, just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

Just a feeling, just a feeling that I have

Maroon 5

FRUSTRATED

It's been such a tough and hard condition for me to face. To be honest, I didn't imagine to have such this relationship. Been in a LDR with my man. Almost 5yrs with no certainty plans in terms of our future. Basically this happens cause he planned this to us since the very first time we were together and it seems like he is the one, creating every story in us til now. It was his decision to stay far away from me, tried to reach his Master degree and have work experiences and get a PR and so on and so on. And so, may I say this is like a SH*T? :,( Ive been crying for weeks and weeks, hoping the best way to God , but there's still no good answers. For all this, I won't give up hoping the best to God. I will always ask His strength as I do believe in Him (including His beautiful plans to me).

I've been trying to hold on this relationship eventhough other people surrounding me disbelieve that this relationship will end up beautifully for any reasons. I'm giving my high respect to them who have advised me and shared their good thoughts & opinions with me. And to be honest, by listening and thinking straight on people advices, actually I have a bit doubt as well to still go along with my man. But, it doesn't mean that I'm gonna give up on this relationship (FOR NOW). I'm still thinking hard on what good decision to make is. Oh God, why do I have to keep on thinking and thinking? Let the good ways pop up in my mind as I will believe that it's Your voice delivered towards me to do.

Deep inside my heart (and out of my logic mind), I have always had a strong belief that Mr. D is the best man and life partner for me who was sent by God to be with. I mean it!

20.11.2011

It was really a beatiful day for those who had their wedding party and engagement.

By writing this post, I just wanna say CONGRATULATIONSSSS!!!! :) :)

Rendy Rosandy

Lenny JK

(on their engagement)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Padang Ganeswara

Jessica Rotikan

(on their wedding)

Ke Laut Aja Deh!!!!!

Stop RACISM!!!!

Benci banget lama-lama punya temen kerja di sini yang notabene racist. Sebut aja namanya "Cindil". Sebutan nama itu aja dibuat sama temen-temen sekantor yang anti sama dia. Gak tau knapa nih anak bisa pilih-pilih temen gitu. HERAAANNNNN! Dia ini hidup di zaman modern, bukan zaman batu, kenapa sih mesti jadi racist gitu? Kayak yang punya tanah leluhur ini nenek moyang nya aja. Sama-sama anak Tuhan padahal. Smuanya sama di hadapan Tuhan, walaupun beda ras, beda tingkat kekayaan harta duniawi, beda warna kulit, beda jenis kelamin. Intinya ya kita semua itu makhluk ciptaan Tuhan yang harusnya saling menyayangi, menghargai dan menghormati. Apaan coba nih sekarang dia mbeda-bedain gini!!!!!

Mau kamu WNI keturunan dan saya WNI pribumi, kita tuh sama taukkkkk! Kesel banget, asli kesel banget! Sama-sama tinggal di Indo aja kok pake belagu gitu beda-bedain antara keturunan sama pribumi. Ggrrhhh.. Aarrrggghhh...

Case 1
Temen-temen BDE smuanya lagi makan di depot seberang kantor trus pas lagi makan smua pada ngliat ada pasangan muda cowok cewek yang beda ras. Udah blak-blakan aja ya, yang perempuan keturunan chinese, yang laki pribumi. Itu smua anak BDE pada diem-diem aja gak mau nyeletuk apa-apa, yah iya lah emang karena gak ada yang aneh. Eh tapi ternyata si cindil nih tiba-tiba nyolot, "Ih, itu yang perempuan pasti dipelet deh sama yang laki!"

Astajimmmmm, menurut eloooooo?!?!?!?! Gilak ya si cindil nih langsung bikin emosi. Nyulut emosi banget kan buat temen-temen BDE yang bukan keturunan. Jadi pada nyolot-nyolotan kan akhirnya. Rusuh kok emang nih anak.

Case 2
Ada temen SMA nya si gre sama doe yang barusan meninggal. Trus si gre sama doe curhat sama cindil tentang temen SMA nya ini yang barusan meninggal karena kanker otak. Diceritain gitu smua pada ikut bela sungkawa turut berduka cita. Salut juga sama perjuangan temennya doe sama gre ini melawan kanker otak nya. Si doe sama gre juga cerita kalo mau ngelayat ke Adijasa. Ehhh, lagi lagi, si cindil ini nyaut, "Loh gre, doe, temen kalian ini ci*a apa ja*a?"

Heloooo?? Apa kaitannya cobak diceritain orang meninggal sama nanya ras gitu? Ya Tuhannn, tolong kuatkan saya supaya jangan sampek kepancing emosi pengen ngelabrak cindil.

Case 3
Yang bikin terkejut nya lagi bos di kantor ini ternyata juga agak racist. Bikin tambah sedih aja. Di kantor ada aturan kalo anak BDE gak bole dapet voucher taxi karena bisa pake mobil kantor. Seandenya gak ada mobil kantor, mereka mesti pake mobil mereka masing-masing buat ke nasabah. Yah udah lah ya dimaklumin aja aturan kayak gini, walopun sebenernya gak fair juga. Untung kalo dapet nasabah kan buat prusahaan, eh lah kok yang BDE-BDE ini pada harus naek mobil sndiri / bayar taxi sendiri kalo gak ada mobil kantor *ngoookkk

Nah yang bikin emosi dari aturan ini, si cindil selalu ngelanggar. Tiap kali mau visit cust dan mobil kantor lagi gak ada, dia mesti deketin bos buat minta ijin dapet voucher taxi dr Mbak Reny. Padahal udah jelas-jelas cindil itu BDE yang notabene gak bole dapet voucher taxi. Eh gitu sama bos DIIJININ dan lebih hebatnya lagi : yak, nyuruh Mbak Reny nulis di form voucher taxi pake atas nama nya bos. Astajimmmmm!!! Padahal VOUCHER TAXI GAK BOLEH BUAT BDE. Si gre sama doe pernah coba minta voucher taxi juga dan minta bos buat ngijinin (a.k.a nulis di form voucher pake atas nama bos) dan ternyata permintaan mereka di-reject sama bos.
SEE? This is totally not fair! :(

Masih banyak lo case-case lain yang bikin sebel, sedih, jengkel, marah. Kalo diceritain smua di blog bisa puanjaangggg. Setiap hari cindil masuk kantor selalu aja bikin masalah. Bukan cuman dia racist, tapi dia juga suka perintah Mas Hendrik (office boy) buat beliin makanan, bikinin minum, dll. Udah gitu, yang bikin tambah parah nih anak tuh bossy banget modelannya. Hampir gak pernah say, "Minta tolong" selalu nyuruh aja gitu pake nada merintah. :(

Tuhan, ajarkan saya untuk sabar selalu, gak terpancing emosi terus sama cindil. Lunakkan hati saya Tuhan untuk mau memaafkan dia. Sering Tuhan saya sakit hati kalau denger nada nya yang merintah-merintah seenaknya sendiri ke saya.

E-me-jing

Have watched so many inspiring videos and browsed lots of inspiring blogs lately.

One of those inspiring videos is as you can see below.

No wonder that her voice is totally amazing. Behind her disability, she still can prove God's talent in her. Her voice gave me goosebumps.

BIG BOSS is coming to town

Waiting for big boss from Oz to come is very unpleasing me.

Been cleaning my desk, organizing stationaries, and getting everything right on the proper place since yesterday my boss announced that BIG BOSS would be visiting branch today and talking to some new staffs. Oh mo oh mo, I'm not relax. Not taking it easy either.

I'm a bit worried to meet her since I'm still new here. I've been learning to adapt fast with my work environment and job desks. There are still lots of things to learn, such as how to handle complaints, how to operate some systems used properly, and pay attention to what are my partners here like.

I don't want to be asked too many things by that boss. I'm worried to have questions about my product knowledge and services I do everyday. At the moment, I suddenly feel like I'm a helpless child.

The skincare products I use for my face

(source : here)

I guess I'm so into these Kiehl's Rare Earth Collection! These series products are suitable for oily-skin type. I've been using these for about 6 months. Actually, I had used to use Clinique 3-Steps Type 3 (Combination Oily), but those seemed to be not working good on my face skin since I got too many acnes and a reddish tone skin. Oh, poor my face that time! It felt horrible everytime I saw my face in the mirror.

BUT, since I used these Kiehl's products, I have felt magically the amazing effects on my skin, comparing to Clinique products. Yeayyy! *wink. My skin now is bump-free and always keeps mate-looking. And also, these products significantly minimize the appearance of my skin pores. I'm so happy to see the results.

As I was told by the Kiehl's consultant representative when first I bought at David Jones, I found these Rare Earth products vert environmentally interesting and I thought these were gonna work on my skin as well. And YES, these really work! :) This collection basically contains Amazonian White Clay ingredients, sourced from Marajo Island, South America. It is known that the clay is gathered from Amazon River and useful to remove excess oils and dead cells which can enlarge pores on skin.

Here I want to share the rundown step of using this collection of Rare Earth products :

1. RARE EARTH DEEP PORE DAILY CLEANSER

This should be used daily, formulated to clean thoroughly your face skin. Having used it, you can feel fined crush particles on it which can gently remove toxins and oils on your skin. You just have to pour a lil' drop on your hand and massage it onto your skin. After that, wash your face until you find your face clean.

2. RARE EARTH PORE REFINING TONIC

It is used as a second phase right after you wash your face using the cleanser. The same as the cleanser, this also helps control excess oil on your skin. My face feels refresh after applying this toner as you can feel the menthol sensation from it.

3. RARE EARTH PORE MINIMIZING LOTION

This pore minimizing lotion is used last to address the appearance of enlarged pores. I always use this lotion in a very little drop to apply thouroughly over my face.

4. RARE EARTH DEEP PORE CLEANSING MASQUE

I love this product SO MUCH. I use this only once a week. It doesn't feel heavy at all on your face when I use it. It maintains your skin from dull-looking.

Oh, beside the good reviews of these products, admittedly there's also a negativity of these products. It's about the smell. Nah, if you hope for yummy smell facial skin care, don't expect that thing too much on these. You can never bump into this product as these don't smell nice hehehe :p But, in my opinions, these have been good products for me though they don't smell lovely.

I LOVE KIEHL'S.

Kokododomeo

Kokododomeo, di hari terakhir sebelum kembali ke habitat nya di negara kangguru

Bye again, Mr. D!

This is his last day since he came here, having a short holiday 10 days ago. Time flies so fast! and I hate that.

For 10days he was here, I felt like I was equipped with so much care and attention from him so I could truly feel heaven on me. Thank you for every laughs, joys, and a bit tears that we had together. I was indeed hypnotized by the way you treated and by our togetherness during your days here.

I've always found hard for me to let you go. I never wish to be parted far away from you. But, I realise that this might be something good and promising for us to run.


I just wanna say a beautiful good bye to you , Mr. D! :,) See you around!