"Apa ini sudah membosankan?"

life is f***ing s**t..!!
i hate my days..
please forgive me God for saying like this..

beneran aku enggak nyangka klo hari-hariku akhir ini bener f***ing s**t!!
i almost cry every single night, and eum.. i want i can get over these problems.it's driving me totally crazy..i mean really crazy!, not "crazy"..
aku enggak tau mau bilang apa, but i wish someone would be here for me coz i really need sholuder to cry on rite now.
well, masalahku sekarang ini emg soal cinta..cinta itu emang rumit ya?!?! (ups bentar mau ambil tissue dulu..)

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okay, here me back..
belakangan ini aku ngrasa banget dia brubah. my boi uda ga kaya dulu lagi yang bisa sedikit perhatian dan jadi temen sharing lagi.my mom told that i should have realized my boi wasn't somebody i could spend the most of my days with. i don't know why she told like that coz i've never told her about my big-no-no problems ever..but, i guess it's like such an instinct mom..
aku sama my boi sering banget tengkar di telp cuma karena masalah sepele. oo my boi, sapa sih yang tahan klo waktu nelpon orang trs dijawab ketus & asal-asalan?apa mgkn karena my boi ga suka kali diricuk'in terus-terusan. deep inside my heart, i don't mean it..aku slalu brusaha tahan diri, tapi klo ga disms ato ditelp my boi ga bakalan juga telpon ato sms ke aku.hukssss :,(
dgn keberadaannya di surabaya sekarang, aku brharap kita bisa lebih intens lagi komunikasi soalnya kan klo di perth blm tentu bisa komunikasi sering-sering.tapi kayanya, aku terlalu byk berharap deh! aku enggak liat sama sekali di dia.
i do love him..we've been together for 2 years (actually i wanted to celebrate our big day that day but a'aaa (geleng-geleng), you were in bali having great holiday with your friends), tapi bukannya lebih saling ngerti dan sayang, eh malah bnyk masalah teruss....

i really need my dad's attention too like he always does to me. i have a close relationship with my dad. he's the one who able to understand and make me feel better when i'm in trouble..tapi aku ga bisa dapetin itu sekarang karena papa lagi di ICU Ramsay Hospital..papa mesti dirawat karena serangan jantung. i hope everything's gonna be alright..my pray is always be with you, pa.. :(

di surabaya skrg, aku juga ga bisa ketemu my boi setiap hari soalnya dia ga bisa setir mobil [yah masih ga kuat gitu tangannya karena kecelakaan di perth itu, nah aku sendiri juga ga bisa nyetir..huuuwaaaaaaaa... :,( ]

okai sip, komplit bngt ya penderitaanku..!